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My heart is still aflutter from the lovely thing that happened to me earlier this week. A longtime friend and colleague, who reads what I write and apparently draws benefit from it, asked me if I’d write something about the Charlie Kirk tragedy for a young woman he knows. This young woman was on the UVU campus last Wednesday, as a protester, and saw the shooting unfold, much to her horror. I’ve never met this young woman, but the request so touched me that I had to respond with something. While I won’t share the letter I wrote her—letters are personal, after all—I thought you might like to read a few (slightly edited) excerpts that explain my take on this horrible shooting. A lot of what I could say in this letter would be abstract, even trite. Maybe the only thing for me to share is what little I knew of Charlie Kirk, and how I took the news of his death. Kirk was mostly not on my radar screen before last Wednesday. All I knew of him was that he’d said hateful things about trans people. From that I assume he also didn’t care for nonbinary people like me. I’m on edge these days because of the growing threat toward people like me from Trumpworld, so Kirk just added to that threat. I can’t say I held any love for him. Yet when one of my favorite independent journalists emailed that he’d been shot, a profound sadness took hold of me. I actually gasped when, not long after, I found out he’d died. The deepest part of my heart believes that no one should kill anyone, ever. I suspect I’ve felt this way from birth. On top of that, my spiritual traditions uphold the supreme importance of doing no harm. All I could feel when I heard the news is, “Aww, no. Someone else died. That’s so horrible.” A little later, I found out he had two young kids. I’ve had a young daughter, and I cannot express how boundless my love for her is. I’m willing to bet Charlie Kirk felt the same about his children. A lot’s been written about Kirk, and I’m trying to determine whether I should learn more about him. But part of me can’t see the point: maybe I can judge him a little more accurately, but what good would that do? At this point I just want to hold onto the sadness I’ve felt about someone who was probably my adversary, and all the good that says about my heart, and about other people’s hearts in general. We can be such a good species when we put our minds to it. One more thing: you were there protesting. Well done you. Assuming Kirk said every nasty thing he’s reported to have said, we desperately need people who will stand up to that and say no. You did that. Which means your presence there, though so painful in the end, made a difference. Thank you.
6 Comments
Jan Fox
9/19/2025 07:18:58 am
This is just a what I needed; probably what so many of us needed. Thank you for writing to that young woman, and thank you for sharing with us.
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12/23/2025 06:01:18 am
The whole experience just made my heart beat faster. I'm so glad it touched you too. Thanks, Jan (and my apologies for being so late to respond).
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Jim Cates
9/20/2025 09:09:20 pm
So beautifully balanced in its approach. Respect for everyone. I so appreciate that voice, in this and all your writing!
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12/23/2025 06:02:49 am
Thank you for the indispensable role you played in all this. Clearly, I couldn't have done it without you.
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Al Vautour
9/21/2025 06:37:33 am
Hey John, well said as my initial response was as yours. Saddened that someone was killed made worse over his having young children and a wife. What I knew about Charlie Kirk was mostly blurbs that came across my Facebook pagr . Most were irritating at best and potentially dangerous at worst. The post that most angered me was his dismissal of the physical abuse that happened in the Catholic church as being due to my indoctrination by the left rather than an accurate memory. I was one of those children (to be clear not sexually but physically abused). Needless to say, I had very little use for him after that. That was until I saw him on the Bill Maher show and somehow the topic came up. What I was struck by was his concern about the person talking about it and what appeared to be some curiosity. That is not to say he entirely won me over, but rather I saw that glimpse of humanity you speak of. In my hope perhaps an eventual shift the likes Malcolm x and the writer of "amazing grace". Those protesting that day I believe were facilitating that potential issue of grace. I pray the horror of the day will eventually grant them healing for their bravery.
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12/23/2025 05:59:41 am
Hi, Al, so sorry I'm so late to responding. What an important comment, especially since Kirk's comments, for you, hit so close to home. I love seeing those Malcolm X-type shifts toward the human in people; wouldn't it have been lovely to see Kirk go the same way, exercising his considerable skills for good?
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